The Legacy of 'Diddle' | FEATURE

Before Johnny Ray McDonald Jr. was laid to rest, he was waked at St. Francis R.C. Church in Hoboken on Dec. 14, 2021. It was a cold, gloomy and rainy day. Despite the conditions, people lined up for several blocks to pay their final respects to the man the community had affectionately referred to as “Diddle.”

Some stood in the rain for as long as two hours. In many ways it was a fitting send off to a man whose entire life was dedicated to bringing the community together. The community came together one last time for him.

“He would have never imagined,” said Vanessa Falco, Diddle’s younger sister. “He was probably aware of how many people he came into contact with through sports, other actives and community. But I don’t think he would have ever expected to see that many people. It was a constant flow for two hours of people that came to pay their respects because in some way or form he had impacted their life. That part was just so reassuring and comforting for myself and my family.

“It almost made me not sad.”

Despite the somberness of the circumstances, the day turned into a celebration of his life as those that gathered shared memories and stories of his life. And what a full 58 years of life it had been.

Born on March 30, 1963, Diddle spent the majority of his life mentoring and coaching local youths in a variety of sports, including basketball and baseball. But Diddle’s favorite sport was hockey. It was fitting with is personality.

“Diddle was interesting because he had unique likes. He’s an African American male, tall in stature, but he didn’t fit the typical characteristics of an African American male,” Falco said. “He always liked things that were different than what the typical young, Black male would like. Hockey is definitely one of those things. That was one thing very unique to him.”

Diddle, whose namesake dons the newly refurbished Hoboken ball hockey rink that sits next to the Hoboken Recreation Center where he worked for nearly 20 years, did more to grow the game of hockey in the area than anyone in the city’s history. The seeds of his love of the game were planted early.

Diddle grew up, the oldest of three, in a community of Hoboken known as Church Towers. It consisted of three large buildings housing 300 families that had its own playground and open space area for children to play. It was with his friends at Church Towers where Diddle – who received his nickname from a babysitting cousin who would read him the nursey rhythm “Diddle, Diddle, Dumpling, My Son John” – began playing hockey. It was the start of a lifelong passion, even though the early 1970s didn’t have a lot of African Americans involved in the sport at any level.

“Once hockey came into play, he saw it as an opportunity,” Falco said. “He was a Black male and it wasn’t common to see Black hockey players. He saw it as a way to bring other people into the sport and educate people into the sport.”

It was Diddle’s other passion – community – that led him to lead a life as a community leader. His chosen avenue was sports. While working at the Hoboken Recreational Department, Diddle founded the City’s first children’s instructional hockey program. He also founded an adult roller hockey league.

“We typically see the mainstream sports – baseball, football, basketball – in communities,” Falco said. “The fact that hockey wasn’t as popular, I think it was a way for him to introduce hockey to other youths and make it be noticeable and different.”

Diddle also founded the first girl’s traveling softball team, was among the founders of the Church Square Men’s Basketball League, supervised Hoboken’s minor league and instructional baseball programs and coached and mentored the City’s youth basketball program.

“That was important to Diddle. He made a significant effort to involve kids and expose them to different activities and sports,” Falco said. “It gives the kids some place to go and show up every day and be committed to something. That is what attracted him to this job and wanting to do better.

“Sports overall is a way for kids, and males specifically, to have friendships and be disciplined and be involved.”

Diddle also spent a lot of his time fundraising to help support his youth leagues to help pay for field rentals, equipment and participation. Sports had provided him an outlet and opportunity as a youth and he wanted all children – regardless of their background – to have the same chances he had enjoyed.

“Part of his work was that he knew that sports had impacted his life in such a way that he wanted to pass that along to so many other youths,” Falco said. “Not all children in this community have had the opportunity and the access. There still is a population where there is poverty. There are people that don’t earn that income.

“I don’t know that he excelled academically, so sports was a way for him to really exemplify his leadership skills and stand out as an athlete.”

Diddle was a standout athlete in his own right. He was a member of the 1980 Hoboken High School state championship basketball team. And he was the ringleader of many local adult teams and leagues. And he didn’t just play the game he loved, Diddle would turn every gathering into a celebration.

“He liked to have a good time,” Falco smiled. “When they would meet at the rink, he would BBQ, have music, have games. It was a gathering and hanging out and hockey. That’s what created the family unit for him and his teammates and the league.”

Diddle was a reserved leader. Though not boisterous, he had a certain charisma that drew people to him.

“He wasn’t quiet, but he was very humble, not so much outgoing but definitely had characteristics of being personable,” Falco said. “People were attracted to that in him. He was very unique. His style of music, his style of dress. He was just different in that way and stood out. He was unique in his walk, in his presence, in his actions.”

Diddle also knew how to throw a party. He often hosted informal gatherings at his backyard pool with his wife Deborah and son Jonathan. It was called “Camp Ray-Ray” and all were welcome. It was also a chance for him to show off his BBQ skills and chess acumen.

It was during games of chess of other board games that Diddle would drop some of his favorite one-liners, such as “you slow, you blow” and “you hesitate, you donate.” Anyone that came into contact with him could rattle off his many turns of phrase.

“He was funny. He always had those little sayings that stick with me,” Falco said. “People that know him could tell you 10 things he would say like that.”

But most of all, people that know him can tell how much he cared about others. During COVID, despite being immunocompromised himself, Diddle would venture out to get groceries for friends and family who caught the virus or were also immunocompromised and personally delivered them.

“He would do anything and he didn’t care if it would compromise himself because he cared more about everyone else than about himself,” Falco said. “He was kind. He was generous. He was thoughtful.”

Diddle’s memory lives on for those that were lucky enough to have come into contact with him. He has in a way molded and shaped the lives of multiple generations. Some of the children he mentored went on to have their own family’s and then their children would also be mentored by Diddle. And his legacy has lived on since his passing.

The rink where he taught and played many of his games underwent a multi-year $230,000 rehabilitation project. A three-year partnership between the New Jersey Devils, City of Hoboken, NHL and NHLPA culminated in the Oct. 4 unveiling of the new ball hockey rink.

The rink was named after Diddle and in his honor: The Johnny Ray McDonald Jr. ‘Diddle’ Hockey Rink.

Falco, who is the department head of the Division of Housing for Hoboken, works in the Department of Community Development building, which sits right next to Diddle’s Rink. Every day that she comes to work, she passes by and is reminded of her brother, his legacy and his impact.

“There isn’t any other park that I can go to that’s named after a Black person,” she said. “It’s just not typically done or what we see. That alone, it feels good. It lets you know that his efforts are acknowledged and recognized and important to the community as a whole. We can see that his impact is valued.”

A plaque of Diddle stands prominent at the entrance reading, in part: “He played and mastered all sports, but his true calling was hockey. He loved the game of hockey. He learned how to play at an early age and was instrumental in introducing the sport to many Hoboken youth and adults. … Hockey was his favorite past time, and this rink is dedicated to him and the many memories that will continue to be created here.”

Diddle created many memories for children and adults on that very surface.

“(Hockey) wasn’t happening in Hoboken. There wasn’t an adult hockey league (before him),” Falco said. “What he did was bring that to Hoboken and to people that are transient. It created a community of people that you wouldn’t ordinarily think would be together, but they were, and it was a family and it was for years.”

Hockey was Diddle’s love. And he even died while doing what he loved. He collapsed on the ice while playing a hockey game on Dec. 9, 2021, and past at the age of 58.

“How cool is he that? Of course, he went out doing what he loves to do,” Falco said with a smile. “That’s just him.”

The full scope of Diddle’s impact on the community was felt at his wake, which took place in a church that sat two blocks from his old place of work and ball hockey rink, when droves of people endured the rain to see him one last time. Diddle touched multiple generations of people in the Hoboken community. They all remember him as Coach Diddle.

“The impact he had on so many different people, women, young men, older people, Black, White, Asian, it was astounding. That’s the only word I can think of,” Falco said. “It almost made me not sad (when he died). It made me really, really proud. He was this person that you didn’t think had such an impact, but he really, really did.

“It showed that day. And it showed through every person that he’s come into contact with. And still to this day.”

Photos courtesy of Vanessa Falco.