One Small Act Can Shift the World | FEATURE

In 2015, a group of youth hockey players finished a two-hour grueling sprint workout on a track in Sudbury, Ontario when the sprint coach called them together. The coach said they were going to do 10 more sprints to finish off practice.

One of the younger players responded with: “I can’t believe you’re making us do this. That’s so gay.”

One of the older players in the group heard this. He turned to the former and said: “We don’t say that here. Give me 50 pushups.”

So, the younger player dropped down and did 50 pushups while the rest of the players watched and took note. And from there on, anytime a player used any type of homophobic language, 50 pushups were demanded and given. And the ritual spread throughout that team and soon to other teams throughout the region and beyond.

“In that moment, I knew that we could create a shift in this culture,” said Brock McGillis, the first openly gay pro hockey player and an advocate for inclusivity. “We can create shifts for everyone or anything. It doesn’t have to LGBTQ+ but pick the topic: racism, homophobia, misogyny, mental health.

“Each and every one of us has the ability to create a shift.”

McGillis, who had worked with the aforementioned youth players, started a speaking tour across North America called Shiftmakers. He made 150 stops in Canada and another 70-plus in the United States in less than two months. During his speaking opportunities he uses his own life story and experiences as a closeted gay man in the hockey world to humanize himself and other marginalized communities.

McGillis, who has been an active advocate for rights and acceptance for the past decade, teaches simple ways that we can all create shifts so that everyone can be themselves, whether in the hockey world, business world or beyond.

McGillis believes there are three ways to create such shifts in culture: humanize, creating open environments and breaking conformity.

Putting a face, background and story makes it more accessible and real. When people hear the struggles and pains of those that are othered, and are reminded of their humanity, it can change perception.

“When you put a face to an issue it becomes more real,” McGillis said. “It doesn’t matter what the issue is, when we humanize it, it becomes less theory abstract debate, and it becomes more real.”

Creating a safe environment takes courage. Something that is lacking in many instances.

“The easiest way to make sure people don’t feel bad is through your words, through your language,” McGillis said. “But there’s something that comes before language. It’s to be brave.”

McGillis breaks language down into five categories:

• Direct: saying hurtful things and slurs to someone; essentially bullying
• Indirect: saying slurs that aren’t directed at an individual, but still can be hurtful such as “that’s so gay”
• Laughter: when you laugh at slurs in order to fit in and not be targeted by the group
• Body: a dirty look or shrug or other movement at gays, lesbians, trans, etc. that gets a point across without words
• Silence: ignoring slurs from family and friends, making one a silent accomplice

It takes bravery to fight back against those pieces of language. It’s easy to be quiet. It’s easy to laugh to conform or fit in. It’s easy to stay silent to avoid being the next one targeted. It’s easy to not rock the boat.

What’s hard is breaking the conformity. Both in words and actions. Because why would you want to conform to something that you are not?

“The most profound thing I’ve figured out in the last nine years, normal doesn’t exist,” McGillis said. “It’s fake, a fallacy, an illusion.

“We’re all a bunch of weirdos and that’s a beautiful thing. The sooner you are to embrace your weirdness, your uniqueness, the less likely you are to judge others for theirs.”

While working with teams, McGillis gets players to share something personal about themselves that they don’t feel comfortable sharing with their teammates because of the locker room culture and environment. But once they share, things shift.

An indigenous player told his teammates that he pretends he’s OK with their racial jokes but he’s really not. Another player shared that he is bipolar and struggles every day. Another player shared that he loves dressing his 9-month-old daughter every morning.

But because of the environment that exists in the locker room, those players would never have shared those things with their teammates without the encouragement of McGillis. And it usually takes one player to share first before the rest of the team follow suit and open up as well.

“You have the ability to foster an environment where everyone feels welcome and OK and can be their full selves at work, clubs and teams their apart of, just by being yourself and bringing your full self with you,” McGillis said. “When everyone is vulnerable, it fosters empathy.”

McGillis’ biggest message is to bring your full self everywhere you go every single day.

“Be unapologetic about it,” McGillis said. “Because if you do, you’re going to be happier, you’re going to perform better. And you’re going to foster an environment where other people, you won’t even realize, are going to do the same thing. They’re going to follow your lead and do it too. They may never tell you. It will happen I guarantee you.

“It’s that small little shift that has a massive ripple effect.”

One hockey player in Sudbury in 2015 told another, “We don’t say that here. Give me 50 pushups.” And the other players in that group saw that and started standing up against homophobic language. And as those players went on to other teams, those teams adopted the same standard. And the younger players on all these teams saw the older players conduct themselves in this manner, and they followed.

That one player in Sudbury in 2015 inspired McGillis to come out and begin his advocacy work. And because of that player, thousands of people have come to McGillis over the years struggling – some in life and death situations – and he’s worked with them to find help.

One player in Sudbury in 2015 made one small gesture. And as a result, he saved lives.

That’s the power of one small gesture against homophobia or other slurs and prejudices. And that power resides in all of us.

“You all have the ability to do that,” McGillis said. “You all have the ability to create those small little shifts.”