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The Royal Half Report: Issue #2

by The Royal Half / Los Angeles Kings
Disclaimer - The contents of this page have not been reviewed or endorsed by the Los Angeles Kings Hockey Club. All opinions expressed by The Royal Half are solely (and most likely) his own and do not reflect the opinions of the Los Angeles Kings or their Hockey Operations staff, parent company, partners, or sponsors. His current whereabouts are not known to the Kings and he has no access to information beyond the access and privileges that go along with being a half-season ticket holder


  GIF That Best Represents the Past Two Weeks for the LA Kings: From Monday, September 22nd:

In 45 total games last season, Anze Kopitar and Marian Gaborik combined for 82 points.

Since the LA Kings season starts next week, it's as good a time as any to remind you of this:




It's hard to believe that Frozen Fury is upon us once again... probably because most LA Kings fans just sobered up from last year's dual games edition. Honestly, Frozen Fury is the best pre-season event in the NHL. For the 16th year, Kings fans converge on the MGM Grand Hotel in Las Vegas to yell and scream in the faces of 6 Colorado Avalanche fans.

This years Frozen Fury is a little bittersweet however, as for 4 distinguished Unrestricted Free Agents... this could be the last time they go to Las Vegas as members of the LA Kings.

Alec Martinez is totally Kevin Kline in this scenario.

If you've been to Frozen Fury 15 times... or if this is your 1st... here are 3 Simple Rules to Enjoying Frozen Fury.

1) Please... drink responsibly.


The majority of Kings fans gather outside the Food Court just near the entrance to the MGM Grand Garden Arena to basically scream in the faces of Colorado Avalanche fans.


If you are in Vegas for Frozen Fury and the sun is up... then you better be at the MGM Grand Lazy River.

Make sure you order the frozen grape drink that #TeamTRH's own PumperNicholl nicknamed "Luc Robitussin" at last year's Frozen Fury. And don't be surprised if you happen to run into a few of the players in the Lazy River!

  CURSES, SPORTS ILLUSTRATED! This week, the Anze Kopitar-izing of America took another step forward as the LA Kings superstar graced the cover of Sports Illustrated with some random baseball player.

Looking at you, Anze Kopitar.

I have to say... this Kopitar-Kershaw cover is my 2nd favorite Sports Illustrated cover ever.


Nailed it.

Everybody was talking about the latest Sports Illustrated cover this past week... AND I MEAN EVERYONE!!!

Willie Mitchell is the ex-girlfriend that still stalks your Instagram account.



The LA Kings pre-season is nearly over and we here at The Royal Half wanted to take an in-depth look at the biggest battle going on in Training Camp.

Ha, you thought this was about Andy Andreoff making the final roster?  Nope, it's...

That's right, the biggest Training Camp Battle™ going on right now is between current LA Kings Insider, Jon Rosen, and original gangster LA Kings Insider, Rich Hammond. If you don't know, Rich Hammond served as the LA Kings Insider from 2009 to 2012 before moving on to cover USC Athletics for the Orange County Register. Jon Rosen began his turn as LA Kings Insider in January of 2013 and continues to blog so hard for the team. And then... as fate would have it, the OC Register moved Rich Hammond back onto the LA Kings beat just a few months ago. It's pretty much the exact same scenario as why there is now both Coach and Winston on New Girl.

Let's see how these two young upstarts match up!


In a recent blog post, Jon Rosen compared the LA Kings relatively boring pre-season to Homer Simpson's "Everything's OK Alarm."

While this past week, Rich Hammond showed off his vast knowledge of the Star Wars universe.



Both LA Kings Insiders, past and present, have shown an astounding Complete Level when it comes to trolling the other California hockey franchises:






Our recap of the past two weeks in all things #Gustl.


: What The Players Really Do During The Pre-season   SECOND ROUND: LA Kings making fun of each other and also Drew Doughty That was actually the 2nd most embarrassing photo of Drew Doughty from the past 2 weeks.   THIRD ROUND: Oh Captain, My Captain! Justin Williams wears the Captain's C for a pre-season game versus the Coyotes.

  WINNER: Drew Doughty's sister for retweeting that Snapchat of him.

The Royal Half has been a Los Angeles Kings fan since 1988 and a Half-Season Ticket Holder since 2002. He has seen the following goaltenders play in person for the Los Angeles Kings… Kelly Hrudey, Grant Fuhr, Byron Dafoe, Jamie Storr, Stephane Fiset, Felix Potvin, Cristobal Huet, Roman Cechmanek, Mathieu Garon, Adam Hauser, Jason LaBarbera, Barry Brust, Sean Burke, Dan Cloutier, Yutaka Fukufuji, Jean-Sebastien Aubin, Erik Ersberg, Jonathan Bernier, Jonathan Quick, Ben Scrivens, and Martin Jones. If you like the hockey equivalent of dirty jokes or enjoy humorous screen-grabs of NHL players and broadcasters with funny captions... man, you are going to like The Royal Half. You can follow The Royal Half on Twitter at @TheRoyalHalf

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