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From the Rafters (2.16.15)

by Wyatt Arndt / Vancouver Canucks
The Canucks took on the Minnesota Wild with newcomer Alex Biega getting his first career NHL game for the home team. Read on to find out about Raffi’s demands, Kenins’ hit parade, and an end to end Tim Bits goal of the year candidate.

- You heard the man! Hit everything in green that moves! Forrest green, not kelly green. For people who aren’t color enthusiasts (and if not, what are you waiting for) kelly green is the color on the Canucks jersey. For those who knew that already, pat yourself on the back and have a cookie. You earned it.

- Excellent! Team shaming a Boston fan, especially with Vancouver merch, is always highly encouraged.

- The Canucks were without Edler and Tanev for the game, which meant Yannick Weber shot up the depth chart to the number two d-man spot on the team. What a meteoric rise for the young man! If the Canucks injury “luck” continues like this, Weber might end up being the top center by next game, too!

FIRST PERIOD

- Like an ex-girlfriend coming over unexpectedly to pick up the last of her stuff, Jordan Schroeder made sure to once again get a point against his former team.

- If the Canucks DJ can play Miley Cyrus “Wrecking Ball” every time Kenins is on the ice, the opponents will learn to fear that song, or at the very least, get really annoyed at that song. Win win.

Also, Kenins is quickly going to become a fan favorite if he continues to staple people to the boards like that.

- You’re right, Dad is going to need to practice his selfie technique. Props for his compete level on getting through the selfie, however.

- At one point the puck almost bounced in off of Eddie Lack’s back, much to the chagrin of everyone in attendance. Luckily “back” rhymes with “Lack” so it didn’t go in the net (just go with it).

- Kenins plural jokes will continue the rest of his career, you might as well just get used to it. We Are All Kenins.

- Kenins and Dorsett got involved in a contest of seeing who could hit a Minnesota Wild player hardest in the first period. Kenins landed more hits overall, but Dorsett probably landed the hardest hit. To make matters worse, Fin jumped into the action, body checking a Tim Bits hockey player during the intermission (the child ran into Fin, but the story sounds better with an angry Fin running around, throwing body checks on anything that moved.)

SECOND PERIOD

- You know what’s better than a Birthday at Rogers Arena? A birthday with a Henrk Sedin goal. You’re welcome.

- This is fair. Henrik Sedin loves to pass. Give and go? Forget that, he rocks the give and give. He’s always looking to give. Santa Sedin. Except really in shape. And he has a twin brother. And he has red hair. Ok he’s nothing like Santa, but he does love passing.

- We’ve all made PVR mistakes like this, it’s ok. The important thing is you did PVR the game. Nothing is worse than sitting down to watch the game only to be greeted by your PVR mocking you with its empty recorded show slot.

- While those seats are great, you must be ready to be potentially showered in hats should Matthias decide to get a hat trick. Your job at that point is to pick up the hats and throw them on the ice. Matthias loves hats and wants them all. He counts each hat after the game, he’ll know if you took one.

- This was not the power play statistic we were expecting...

- Daniel Sedin threw a huge hit on Nino Niederreiter, then stood over him and roughed him up a bit. Yes, this actually happened. Welcome to bizarro world, you’ll find a slurpee machine on your right, and a statue of Mark Messier winning a Stanley Cup in Vancouver on your left.

- When you’ve got Ronald Kenins straight up murdering people left and right on the ice, you play the man. He was a hitting machine tonight!

THIRD PERIOD

- Eddie loves tacos so much this might actually be true.

- Looking like a young Trevor Linden, Bo Horvat put on his hard hat, tied up his steel toe boots, did his taxes, and went to work in the third period, giving the Canucks a 2-1 lead early on.

- If you thought Kevin Bieksa was the only one to have name great name puns, get ready for some Biega in your life! Biega got his first career NHL goal in his first career NHL game, and got a rousing, rousing ovation from the home crowd. A lady from the Victorian era almost fainted. It was madness.

Drinks, friends, and hockey? That is a top notch way for some Canadians to spend a night. While this selfie was being posted, Minnesota made it 3-2, but that’s something we all agreed to ignore.

- The last minute of the game was insanity. As the Canucks struggled to keep Biega’s first NHL goal a game winner, Eddie Lack and the boys came up huge keeping the Wild from evening up the score. At one point the ice was littered with bodies as all of the Canucks laid down in the line of fire, protecting their gentle Swedish giant of a friend in net. As time expired, the crowd exploded into “Eddie” chants. Atmosphere off the charts.

- The only victim tonight, was Eddie Lack’s vaunted “Lack Attack Dance” which he pulls out after every victory. Instead, he was prying a Minnesota Wild player off of a team mate. The Wild did not enjoy losing.

POST GAME

- The Tim Bits intermission hockey goal of the year has some tough competition this year. We’ve seen a variety of jaw dropping goals this season, and tonight’s goal is no different. End to end rush WITH an ice scoop goal celebration. Pavel Bure is jealous of those moves!

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