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From the Rafters (11.14.14)

by Wyatt Arndt / Vancouver Canucks
The Vancouver Canucks hosted the Pho...Arizona Coyotes. Read on to find out about all the passes, angry Hamhuis hip checks, and high stick goals.

- Pat O'Neil is a staple of Canucks games, so a hearty congratulations to him for reaching 2,500 games. Oh the smelly, wet hockey gear Pat has probably touched over the years...

- This is a good call. It would be awesome to see a Pat O'Neil movie where James Woods is screaming at Daniel Sedin to take his skate off because it has a bomb in it.

- Jim Robson and Tom Larscheid were up in press row before the game, and they had a crowd of people around them. One of those people? Trevor Linden. No word on what was said, but one can assume Jim Robson told Trevor he would play, he would play on crutches at some point.

- This is a wonderful Christmas crafting project. Find an old jersey you have no need for anymore. Maybe it's a #17 jersey. Then put a Vrbata namebar on the back. Like this fella did. Look at that penmanship. Look at that namebar. That is how you recycle a jersey.

FIRST PERIOD

- DON'T YOU JINX THEM!

- Phoenix scored. Are you happy Mister Matt? HUH???

- What makes it worse is that the first goal was scored by that very same Martin Hanzal. It used to be fun to make the "Hanzal is so hot right now" Zoolander jokes. But not anymore. Not anymore.

See Matt? See what you did??

- So James Woods will play Pat O'Neil,and now we have Luigi to play Ryan Miller. Slowly but surely we are putting together a full cast list for the Canucks TV movie. Liam Neeson of course will play Radim Vrbata.

- Mmhmm.

- In a period that wasn't exactly full of over the top action, it's good to know that the pets still support the team.

- Although the Canucks were down 1-0 after the first period, they were outshooting the Coyotes 12-3. Shhhh, just accept this as an awesome positive and move on.

- Oddly enough mumps are indeed popping up in the NHL this year. If it is to go down the Oregon Trail, though, it will end with dysentery. It's always the dysentery that gets you...



SECOND PERIOD

- Poking a goalie's hand after he's covered the puck is a no no at every level of hockey. Amazingly enough it wasn't The Face of All Evil Hanzal who did it this time.

- Hanzal did however end up cutting Stanton with a high stick. It's like he was a spy trained to destroy Vancouver, one player at a time.

- Canucks were out-shooting and out-playing the Coyotes yet trailed 1-0. Ah Hockey Gods, you truly are a fickle bunch.

- After the Coyotes took a 3-0 lead due to a Hanzal hat trick (one of which certainly looked like it was tipped with a high stick) twitter devolved into a sea of angry comments. Oh twitter was angry that day my friend...

- That's honestly the nicest tweet said about the 3-0 lead the Coyotes took.

- It helps a ton when it's the home team getting the hat trick. This is perhaps the most vital part of enjoying a hat trick. Oh how the hats that rain from the sky when it happens...

- Don't blame this on Vancouver Matt, you know what you did!

- In other news, the Canucks have introduced new wine options into Rogers Arena. Gone are the days of "red" wine and "white" wine, and in their place, wines with actual names! Focus on the wine! The glorious, not down 4-0 wine list!

THIRD PERIOD

- There we go, that's the spirit! How do the Canucks get field goals again? 3 goal increments would help a ton here.

- The Canucks won a game in San Jose that they had no right winning, which is why this game had to happen. Hockey must balance out, and this is the universes way of making all things equal again.

- People still weren't over that high sticking non-call, in case you were curious. At least it didn't happen in the playoffs?

- It honestly looked like the highest high stick that has ever sticked high.

- All further high stick calls in this game were met with a certain level of sarcasm from Canucks fans, as one would expect.

- Things really took a turn for the worse when Fin began eating fans.

- Even Hanzal knows he got away with one. This is like a bank robber gleefully admitting he had no idea how the cops didn't stop him.

- Somewhere in there the Coyotes got two more goals. It's during games like this that it's best to move on to the next one.

- Leave it to Johnny Canuck himself to say it best.

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